You probably don’t have a ton of friends, especially with COVID. But that’s OK. (?)

Ted Bauer
4 min readApr 26, 2021

Stunningly to me, considering how much I generally consider psychology and sociology without being a true expert in either, I’ve only mentioned Dunbar’s Number in a blog once, which was this one back in 2015–2016 era. Generally speaking, Dunbar’s Number says the upper limit of your social ecosystem is about 150 people, and that most people have about 4–6 close friends, which is typically your significant other (if you have one), some family members (ditto), and maybe 1–2 non-related people. There’s a whole bunch of shit about posturing, extroversion, etc. that we could bring up here, but we won’t. For the purposes of this conversation, 4–6 close friends (seems reasonable) and 150 people in the broader ecosystem, Facebook friend counts be damned.

Now you’ve got this article from New York Times on COVID shrinking friend circles, which I would absolutely agree with. I think at the intersection of COVID, racial debates, Trump vs. Biden, me getting divorced and remarried, etc. — I’ve probably remade my entire friend list in the last 4–5 years, minus a couple of people. It’s been a ride: at times awesome, at times utterly depressing.

Turning to this Times article:

The past year has forced a mass meditation on the nature and strength of our social ties. While…

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Ted Bauer
Ted Bauer

Written by Ted Bauer

I write about a lot of different topics, from work to masculinity to relationships and social dynamics, I.e. modern friendship. Pleasure to be here.

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