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Wow, Allison Schardin Only Got Probation For SA’ing Some Boys?

A rough one out of Minnesota.

Ted Bauer
2 min readJan 16, 2025

I wrote about this case back when, and when I put the same story on Substack, it made me a bunch of money — weirdly, enough money for me to finance an entire weekend in Santa Fe over the holidays. The true crime fascination knows no bounds.

Basically what happened is this suburban Minneapolis mom was having issues in her marriage, and her family took a “staycation” nearby. Instead of actually spending time with her family, though, she met some teenage boys from Colorado who were in the area for a hockey tournament. She was in a hot tub with them, and apparently her husband came into the area and said, “If you don’t come up the room right now, we’re getting divorced.” She left and went back to the room with her husband — then she snuck out and went to hook up with the high schoolers. If you read the police reports on this, she casually says stuff to the cops like “Well, he was probably embarrassed by getting his first blowjob” and “I dunno, I think one of them fingered me before it got more heated.” She seems like a real gem.

She was up for eight years in prison, but on an amended plea deal, she only got probation — which includes a scant two weekends in jail. She does have 200 hours of community service, mental health treatment, and she…

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Ted Bauer
Ted Bauer

Written by Ted Bauer

I write about a lot of different topics, from work to masculinity to relationships and social dynamics, I.e. modern friendship. Pleasure to be here.

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