Will I Ever Stop Being A Fucking Drunk?

The Eternal Question.

With about 6–8 prolonged exceptions, I’ve been a boozehound most of my adult life. In the process of being said boozehound, I believe you could count my losses as:

• One marriage
• Probably 20–25 friendships, some stronger than others ( ** I do maintain some of that was life stage and distance, however **)
• The quality of my sperm
• One messed-up Honda Pilot
• One DUI that got wiped (Connecticut)
• One time waking up in Coney Island at 3am having no idea where I was (I was on the subway)
• A few other indignities, often hard to list

If you’re interested in that subway story, because tragedy + time = comedy, I will give you that one:

One time, I passed out on a subway and rode it end-to-end (more than once?)

If you want to generally understand why I drink in this way and how I got here, I guess this would probably be the easiest link: