Trying to make the fertility journey happen for you, through it all

I’m in this weird life spot around kids, because I’m from the Northeast, and my ex-wife is from Miami but most of her friends were/are Northeast (I don’t really know her current friend composition, honestly), and in the Northeast you tend to see kids happen a bit later. I was 36 when my ex and I split up; I was two weeks shy of 40 when I got remarried to someone who, at the time, was a few days shy of 32. If you followed any of that math, what happened is … at the time I was getting removed from my ex and I’s friend circle, there were a few newborns and a few pregnancies; those things were happening later. When I entered my now-wife’s friend ecosystem, there were seemingly a million pregnancies, and now there are multiple newborns and still more pregnancies. Through it all, I have exactly nada.

Now, this is not to say woe is me or paint me as a victim, because some of my own issues with slow swimmers and whatnot are tied to my own health concerns and lack of prioritizing some things I should have earlier in life. So, no. Not a victim. Not asking for empathy or sympathy. Just explaining out a contextual situation.

What’s that social science deal where, when you want something, it seems like everyone else has it already? It might be called mimetic desire, although that’s more about jealously, and I don’t…