The Ignominy Of Jerking Off Into A Cup In A 1970s-Style Recliner
Welcome to masculinity, friends. Well, for some. Pull up a goddamn seat.
Back in August ’21, I wrote a post on my old main site about why sperm collection rooms always have recliners in them. Apparently I’ve never cross-posted that on Medium. Maybe someday I shall.
I would generally auger (argue?) that many men, or at least more men than would ever admit it, have jerked off in a room somewhere due to general fertility testing, disease, and/or their wife telling them, “This whole thing is taking longer than I thought it would.” I’ve been to fertility clinics for roughly 2.5 years or so now, and I’ve seen a lot of dudes in there dropping off samples, or getting ushered into a room to create the sample. The word “create” did a lot of heavy lifting in that sentence.
Actually, before I continue this post, let me give you two stories about men and sperm collection from my own time in the trenches:
- On the day my wife had her “egg retrieval” (I won’t explain what that is; Google it if you care), another couple in the clinic had their retrieval as well. The retrieval takes about 40 minutes. A guy normally isn’t in the room for the retrieval itself. He comes in later and you find out how many eggs you got, etc. OK. So my…
