“Motherf*cker, The Phone Works Both Ways”

Stuff people say when they want you off their back.

Got divorced back in 2017. I was a 36 year-old male, no kids, had lived in Texas for a little less than three years. Had some friends there, sure, but didn’t live anywhere near most of my college friends, and by 36, I didn’t have a ton of HS friends left. (Some do, but I wasn’t blessed in this way.) I guess I selfishly kinda figured that some people would care and reach out and ask how I was doing and stuff, but that didn’t really happen at all. Essentially, no one reached out aside from my mom and a few local people. I basically spent most of March 2017 to August 2017 talking to people in bars about their life. While illuminating, I wouldn’t say it was a very good use of my time. Live and learn, ya know?

Well, if I ever remotely tried to call someone on their shit about not reaching out, I got the normal list of excuses:

• “So busy with the kids.”
• “Busy season at work.”
• “Boss is on me.”
• “I don’t know what to say.”
• “Phones work both ways.”

While all these things are true and logical statements a person can make in times of crisis for another, it’s hysterical to me how we wring our hands about “mental health…