Infertility: What It Feels Like To Not Be Able To Do “The One Thing”
The general context
Just to get this one out of the way up top: not sure I’m “infertile,” but I have limited avenues of fertility, and it’s largely because I didn’t take care of myself very well in my 30s. Might still happen naturally, might not, and other avenues might be pursued, be that IVF or adoption or foster. This is life, and it’s also life smacking you in the face (and/or genitals). Let me see if I can illustrate some of this for you.
- This will probably sound either very selfish or very basic, or potentially both, but one of the concerns — and I’ve heard this from females with fertility issues, or those who had miscarriages — is that it’s easy to look around and see a bunch of downer dads who make you think “Why does he get to do it, and not me?” Literally every time I am in a bar/restaurant and see kids running around and the dude on his iPad, or the dude telling his wife “Leave me alone, golf is on” as the kids throw rocks at each other (seen this), I want to scream. Why impregnate someone that you don’t respect with something you don’t appear to want? Now, I also don’t know what those guys are like back at the ranch. They may be great.