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How To Do The Whole “Juicing” Thing As A Fat, Self-Entitled, Pompous Asshole
I had a brief phase with juicing in maybe mid-to-late 2015. I had a maybe $40 juicer off Amazon at the time, and my ex-wife and I did it for probably two-three weeks, and then abandoned it. We were doing a lot of kale. It was coming out OK, but rough. I remember it being a lot of work.
I guess before I get into some specifics herein, let me give you a rough layout of my own health journey. It’s not blissful. I’m a fat pig sometimes — better in some years — with a lot of struggles around depression, drinking too much, self-loathing, anger, and probably some self-entitlement. How’s that for some transparency, eh? I’ve never had amazingly busy professional entanglements since I was a teacher, so I’ve day-drank a lot in my 20s and 30s.
I had three kinda “focused” workout periods, maybe four. One was a little half-marathon phase I had in maybe 2009–2011, where I was running a decent amount. I’m very tall (6–6, 6–7) and often fat, so I probably shouldn’t have…
