I’ve written more about this topic than I ever would have reasonably imagined in my life I would end up writing about it, including this ditty on the “boys don’t cry” problem of work and this jam on potential new definitions for masculinity. I think about being a dude a semi-regular amount, as I often viewed myself as a failed one, and I think about male friendships a lot too. I wouldn’t call myself an expert on these topics, no, but I also think anyone who claims to be an expert on masculinity is so full of shit it’s coming out their ears. Masculinity is a very broad topic, and one Medium post won’t distill anything effectively. Still, let’s try!
What are some core tenets?
This varies by guy, and by region, without question. And it has evolved over the past few decades, which is good. But by and large, I still feel like many first-world males view themselves as successful dudes if they:
- Make money
- Nice trappings
- Nice wife
- Produced kids
- Maybe can build stuff, do physical stuff
- Get laid with some degree of regularity
If you gave a man maybe 3 out of 6 on that list, including the top and bottom, I think most guys would look in the mirror and smile. I could be wrong about that, but I don’t think I am.
What of this supposed evolution?
Indeed, indeed. Here’s a new article from Harvard Business Review. This article is mostly good, and does have research/stats (always helpful), but it also follows the narrative trajectory many articles have come to follow recently, which is:
- Here’s a massive problem simplified to a base equation.
- COVID was bad and the aftermaths will fundamentally shift society.
- Gen Z will be different than Boomers.
- Everyone is caring about diversity now.
These things are true, but we take them at face value without questioning them too often. COVID was bad, undeniably (is bad, actually), but human brains crave normalcy, and we may simply race back to that without anything really “changing” writ large, minus our scales and…
