Aren’t Most Friends “Fair Weather?”

By Semantic definition, that would be an unequivocal “yes.”

I turned 44 about four weeks ago. I know absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of life and am mostly a pathetic excuse for a man and human being, but I have had a lot of time to write and ruminate on things over the years — for better and for worse. One thing I can absolutely say is that, yes, into one’s life you probably get 4–5 good friends over time, and those friends might even move in and out in chapters re: geography, age of kids, health, etc. So, by definition or by semantics, most people you call “friends” are, in fact, going to be “fair-weather friends.” I don’t necessarily mean that in a bad way, because those types of people can still show up in key moments or fill key narrative slots in your life. But are they “ride or die?” Absolutely not.

Here’s a good example: I got divorced in March of 2017. I left the final weekend of that month to let my ex move out in peace. In hindsight, I should have just gotten a hotel room in town or something. I thought the whole “leaving” thing was some type of grand gesture; fuck if I know why I thought that. I was a moron. So, I roll to Tucson and stay with a friend of mine (an actual friend, at the time), and that weekend went sideways (because, you know, it was a depressing one for me) and now me and that kid…