All the days that Instagram moms consider to be Super Bowl Sunday

A partial rundown, starting from January 1st:

Easter: This tends to fall in April, and tends to be the first major Super Bowl-ish event for IG moms in a calendar year. While a focus on your family’s beauty, your home’s beauty, your dog’s beauty, etc. utterly misses the point of the day, it tends to be very important to this ilk to have that photo — ideally with some pastels — posted either before or after church, potentially with a multi-photo approach incorporating brunch or some such.

Mother’s Day: In an idealized world, the father would have an Instagram account and honor you, but it’s also very tricky for your man to have an Instagram account, because that means he’s probably off looking at those co-eds doing the splits in his down time, and we don’t want that. So what tends to happen on Mother’s Day posts is that IG moms “get real” about the struggles of motherhood, or the struggles of postpartum, or the struggles of childbirth, and bring it all back to the narrative of “I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.”

Father’s Day: This is the day where IG moms double down on the thesaurus and the dictionary in order to find adjectives and nouns to describe their husband, usually around stability, income, one anecdote about something that happened when he was playing with one…